Class of 2012

My husband being British does not get the whole graduate from highschool, send invites to people your kids do not even know and expect....money in return! I guess I must admit it is a bit of a ridiculous tradition, so I just said and did nothing. After several people "encouraged" me to let people know, I decided a mass email was best.....so here it is:

Hello all!!!

Since we are obviously not the typical "traditional" family I did not do the typical traditional thing. I was then told I should be traditional and spread the word.... So here I am "non traditionally" spreading the word!

On April 18th Keean officially at 15 graduated from highschool! I guess he would be considered the class of 2012 and with no prom, homecoming or cap and gown he is thrilled with his accomplishment!! He has already gone off for a week in Florida to work as an assistant to a choreographer and has now left for a month for England to visit family, perform in a dance piece in London, and travel a bit on his own!  He continues to work in the entertainment industry and feels blessed with all the opportunities that have come his way. he would like to attend college in the fall, but also wants to keep his options open and go with the flow. Whatever he chooses it will be his choice and therefore the right one for him!

When I decided to take the boys out and homeschool at 7 and 10, I must say my biggest fears were the teenage, highschool years. Well, I was once again wrong! As much as I thought this journey was for ME to teach my children, they have taught me. They taught me there are different ways to do things and learning happens all the time not just sitting at a desk with books! They showed me that at a young age they know what they want and are very capable of doing many things we as society believe they are too young to even consider!
So here is a "cheers" to homeschooling, mama letting go and allowing her children to learn the way they want to learn and following your passions.

CONGRATULATIONS KEEAN! You did it! And did it your way!! We are very proud of ALL of it!

Love to all! Have a great summer!
Brenna and her men!

Thinking For Themselves

Why is it so hard for us to let our children just think for themselves? Why do we feel the need we always know what is best? We feel just because we are older and wiser we know best. Well, that is not always the case. Yet, the single most difficult thing to do is sit back and watch them fail or make a mistake. Making mistakes is part of learning. By constantly "fixing" everything for our children, we are showing them that we do not trust in them to make their own choices and decisions. 

When Keean went to take his High School Exit Exam, I must admit I was a little concerned. For my standards, I did not feel he had studied enough. Only a month before did he choose to get a book and start "studying". It was all I could do to not "force" more studying. But this was his thing. His idea. His money. His time. So who am I to tell him "how to do it"? 

Well, today at 1pm Keean found out he PASSED! And passed well! At 15 years old, Keean is officially a high school graduate! He is so proud of himself, and he should be. He was able to think for himself, and start to finish, met a goal of his own choosing. Nothing feels better than being trusted to make your own decisions. Either way, pass or fail, Keean I am so proud you. You had the courage to try. The courage to make it happen. And the courage to think for yourself! Well done!

ADHD....What To Do?

I must say after watching these clips I was a little disappointed?  Did anyone see the whole show? We did not see the whole show due to the fact we do not have TV, but my mom saw it and was really disappointed with the treatment of the single, homeschool mom. After watching these clips, I can already see how this interview must have gone. And seeing some of the comments it looks to me that the drug companies have won out! This makes me very sad. I am not against using medication, but I believe there are many alternatives before having to go down that road. My two boys without a fact would have been diagnosed with ADD/ ADHD and then some, but that to me is what makes them unique. Has it been easy? Were there times that I would like to pull my hair out? Absolutely! But who said parenting was easy. Please watch these videos and go on Anderson and comment. Maybe if enough of us speak out there will be more and more people out there wanting to try another way. A pill will not fix everything. Some of us are meant to be different and go about life against the grain!

PROUD.... AND FREE

Cade wrote these poems and many others starting last year. 

When Cade was 7 years old and in school he would consistently stuff all his many worksheets and writing papers into his desk. Because for Cade to actually write was an exhausting task. His math tests were also very low, but when we brought them home to work on them he told me every answer correctly(orally) He of course was reprimanded, called lazy, and had recess taken away many times. The teacher told me he was very bright and always raised his hand in class which is why she felt he was just being lazy. My little boy, full of life, spunk and spirit was slowly "dying" right before my eyes. That was the year I took my kids out of school. I could not sit back and watch an institution take away my kids' "out of the box" ways.

I later found out Cade has what is known as dysgraphia. To think of all the children out there with the same issue and no one has even heard of it. My point is this, I took Cade out of school and was instructed to NOT make him write. Everything to be done orally as much as possible. Of course, it was not easy seeing how bad Cade's handwriting was and at times my own insecurities of people judging him and then me as his teacher would get the better of me. But I knew in my heart that I needed to once again let go and allow Cade to be free in how he was going to get along in this world without having brilliant penmanship and spelling. So I let go. I told Cade to just write, anything and anyway. I was not going to "check" it or tell him to rewrite it. I just wanted him to learn to do basic writing tasks like writing a check, filling out a form etc. He wanted to show me what he had been doing and at first glance it was hard to read or even comprehend, but the content, brilliant. Cade was writing pages of poetry and quotes. Some inspired by different paintings and some inspired by life. It is a joy of his(as long as I do not take over and ruin it)  These writings of his and many more give me such joy. I am so proud of you, Cade. For being true to yourself and being free.

MIDNIGHT SWING

Sitting on my swing going up, up high

Seeing the moon reflecting off the high tide

Worries are gone

Hair pushed in the midnight wind

No hurt 

No pain 

On the midnight swing

Toes wiggling with joy 

Heart thumping like a stampede 

Moving fast 

Moving slow

Never wanting to let go

On my midnight swing

WE’RE HERE

We are just like you

We see the sun go up

We see it go down

We stop

Slow down

And look around 

Hoping for a kind heart to come by

Look at us and help

Rather than shiver and run

We need help

That’s all we ask

Not a huge house

But food and a blanket

But no such luck

As you walk by

We’re more like statues 

With broken eyes.

FREEDOM

You take those first steps onto the stage

Each clap boost your spirit

As the light hits your body

It warms you of happy thoughts

And as you are about to do your craft

You thank God

 For His gift

QUOTES BY CADE

Your imagination can fly if you set it free.

My love is gone and now I see she was not for me.

Money can disappear, but art stays forever.

How did we get here?  Love.

Acquaintances are nice.  Friends are great,  but family is the BEST.

Poems are written by angels.

Love is more powerful than war.

Dance creates hearts.

The sun is made by angels.

Life is a race not a walk.

Movies place you in other worlds.

Water runs the world.

Rainy Day Test Day

A well needed rainy day.

Up early to take KJ to a nearby high school to take his high school exit exam. At 15 he may be officially done with "high school" whatever that means. For KJ it means freedom to start taking college courses of his choice, work as an adult, and basically just get on with it. Completely all his idea and research start to finish. He made it happen. Now we wait to find out the results. If he passes it will be proof positive that sitting at a desk for 6 hours a day, with textbooks,worksheets, following a fixed curriculum  and lecture after lecture for  5 days a week, 9 months a year, and for 12 years is a waste of precious playing, seeing, growing, loving and learning time.

KJ said it was weird being in a school setting again. It has been 6 years since he has had to sit at a desk. The test was 3 1/2 hours long. Sitting for that long was a bit of a challenge. He feels so thankful for his years of "schooling". And even though it has been a bit of a roller coaster for me at times, all in all it is the best gift I could have ever given my boys. The gift of freedom to learn and find their way. Not easy to do as a parent. Sometimes I think my boys have taught me more than I have taught them. This is I know for sure.

Came home. Cade baking "green cookies" in honor of St. Patty's Day. They have a party tonight with some fellow homeschoolers, and it is a potluck, so of course......cookies.

Played the game of Life. Bills, taxes, insurance, buying and selling houses.....I wish I could just spin a dial and get paid $100,000. That would really be the "Life" Of course I won!

Quiet house. I hear the rain pitter pattering against the house. So quiet. Mark away on business. Time to reflect. Take a breath. Life is good. I am blessed.

The Worse BLOGGER!

Okay, it is official. I am the worse blogger. Week after week I think of things to write then I let them slide and soon to be forgotten forever. So my new thing is to Blog more.

Let's hope I can stick to it.

This week:  Boys and I traveled up north to wine country, where Mark is on business, to join him for a few days. The beauty of homeschooling is that we can just up and go whenever we want. So we did. Great time and beautiful day, but KJ and Cade are total city boys now and although they can appreciate a small town, they sure love big cities! We went for a nice walk around the lake, searched for a "hike" which ended up being not so nice but were able to skip a few rocks along the river, see several dead animals, and some old car parts dumped in the river(no comparison to our lush hikes in Dominica) but an experience nonetheless and time spent together is always an "adventure". We then made it to a few thrift stores which we call "treasure shops" and found a pack of coasters and 2 great books for $2 then headed back for The Ellen Show in the hotel(we do not have TV so we love to catch her show when we can) Then pool time where the boys beat the heck out of each other and call it fun????  I had a relaxing moment in the hot tub with my head just below the water so I could block out the dulcet tones of boys wrestling ....AWWWWW.

Our Christmas Idea

I got to thinking as we are a bit more settled and not moving around as much I would share more of our day to day learning and ideas that I felt worked or didn't work. Either way just things we do as a family that may or may not be the "norm" if you know what I mean.

One being Christmas. Not the actual meaning of Christmas, but how we chose very early on to celebrate it. I must say, I, along with Mark, were very frustrated with the "retail nightmare" of Christmas. So we decided not to exchange gifts and just enjoy time together or do a handmade card/gift. It was a great idea that we passed on to my family which of course took ALL the stress out of our holidays. No more fighting the crazy lines in shops, wondering what to give the person who has everything, good ole just hanging with good company, games, movies and food was all we needed.

Then we had kids and thought what now?

Well, first of all when they are under the age of 2 they have no idea anyway so we just enjoyed our traditions of decorating the tree and visiting family etc.  We would watch other folks go absolutely crazy buying and buying when in the end the kid only wanted to play with the box! So we decided it is up to us. Whatever we start we have to continue with. We can make the rules. We don't have to fall into the trap of topping each year with more or bigger gifts.

We both decided we would start our own Christmas tradition and our children would only receive 3 gifts. Just like baby Jesus received.  I mean it was the least we could do. It is HIS birthday anyway right? I figure if we were to celebrate Christmas and the whole Santa thing we could at least somewhat parallel it to Jesus on His day? Well, sort of...I guess Santa in the red suit with the magic reindeer were not by Jesus' side. Anyhow, you get the idea.  So we started our tradition. The boys put out cookies for this wonderful Santa who brought 3 gifts to them and got SO very excited year after year. They never made long daunting lists, yet always felt like they got SO many presents! Mark and I would literally go out on a day together(like a date for us just being alone together) and chose the 3 gifts and a few stocking stuffers and Voila....done...no stress and NO stress on our pocket books! And we tell all the family to not buy the boys gifts either. They can spend time with them and spoil them when they want to. Just not when everyone else and their mother is doing it.

We still do the tradition of 3 gifts even though they do not believe in Santa Clause anymore(which is a story all in itself) but I feel that by never "over doing it" the boys are really appreciative and not greedy when it comes to the holidays.  They love just decorating the tree, traveling to my parents, good food, good company, and lots of good movies! And NOT so focused on ALL the gifts they are going to receive. So far a good idea for all!

A "Gypsy" Holiday

Yes, I know, we are gypsies no more, but for some reason we just can't stay put. Since moving in on the end of Oct we unpacked, and a month later we were packing up and hitting the road. We have been to Vegas, Colorado, Vermont, Florida, and NYC. I must say the fact that my kids are homeschooled gives us the freedom to take these trips with "low stress".

We followed Mark to Vegas on business treated to some  FANTASTIC Cirque shows then drove to Colorado to continue our tradition we left 3 yrs ago, spending Thanksgiving at our "Slice of Heaven" (Our barn nestled in the Wet Mountains) Our Thanksgivings have never been 'traditional'. I mean Mark is British, so we decided we can do whatever we want. I remember as a very picky kid I despised Thanksgiving and all those horrible cooking smells, but then having to eat them...YUCK! So I thought why not have a day where my kids can choose whatever their favorite foods are and be thankful for those.  We have gone from lots of sweet treaty foods to roasted chicken, potatoes, steak, salad, corn and more! Definitely a little different cooking on a gas stove or open fire, but WOW what an experience and fun for all.  I managed to visit some close friends in Colorado which was the icing on the cake.

We then came back for a short week and headed to Vermont for Mark's work holiday party. What a difference being in the west during the winter and the east......BRRRRRR cold! How soon we forget! We thought everyone was enjoying sunny and 70 degrees.

Back again for a quick week then off to our tradition of spending the holidays in Florida with my family. Keean went out a week earlier to spend some one on one time with his grandparents then we followed. Always a joy having this blessed time with my parents. As difficult as it is at times to see my mother worsen, I cherish every single moment I have whether it be with tears shed or loads of laughter. Ended our time in Florida with fireworks, boat rides, fishing, good food and lots of good movies! Mark and Keean visited Vermont for Mark's work and Keean taught a hip hop master class at a local studio.

We then met in NYC! WOW is all I can say....and to think we actually lived there for a year and half. The WOW factor never dies. What a place and to be treated to such a nice room in a hotel is a true treat for our family!!!!! Every moment in NYC was such a blast! Keean performed in a fan show for Billy Elliot as it is closing in NYC. Good fun seeing all the alumni...what a great reunion party! "Billy Elliot"was fantastic and "Book of Mormon" an absolute hoot(of course totally inappropriate for Cade but oh well, I guess I win the bad mom award) We all loved it and what talent on the stage! We then went to a very artistic outing called 'See No More" a "Shakespeare" play of Macbeth http://sleepnomorenyc.com/ You as the audience walk into an old hotel with many floors, wearing a mask, and watch the actors do their thing you can snoop and touch anything apart from the actors and really just watch as a story if any unfolds. Sometimes they use you as part of the story as I found this out when I got pulled into a wardrobe and spoken to in a Russian accent about ???? then left there with the door locked, but realized there was a secret passage door.  You end up getting separated from your group and when all is said and done you meet up and realize everyone had totally different experiences.Very weird and cool all at the same time, if you are willing to step out of your box and just go with it!

Another great traveling adventure....now back to our new home. I wonder if we will remember where we put everything.